IMS - Blog

Rewiring Emotional Patterns: Unlocking the Power of Your Nervous System

Written by Joey Klein | Mar 12, 2024 1:00:00 PM

 

 In the summer of 1975, the movie Jaws opened in thousands of theaters across the country and became the first “blockbuster”. Jaws was more than just a movie; it was a phenomenon. During that summer, beach tourism actually went down because people were suddenly scared a great white shark would eat them up. For years afterward, millions of people were afraid to go in the water, and not just the ocean. Lakes, rivers, even swimming pools! It’s what came to be known as “the Jaws effect”. So what was going on there? How could a movie cause such a profound reaction in so many people?

We hear the word trauma and we tend to think of big, horrible, catastrophic events. Wars, earthquakes, mass shootings, violent assaults, murder. I don’t think anyone would deny these are extremely traumatic events. But trauma doesn’t always occur in the form of something from our worst nightmares. According to the Oxford dictionary, trauma is the result of “a deeply distressing or disturbing experience.” During that summer, almost 50 years ago, sitting in theaters with their popcorn and Milk Duds, millions of Americans shared in a mass traumatic event that planted a seed in their minds: Sharks are scary → Sharks are in the water → Stay out of the water.

When I was four or five years old, I got bit by a dog. I’m sure it wasn’t the dog’s fault, I was probably being a knucklehead, sticking my hand through a fence when I shouldn’t, and the dog latched onto my forearm like it was a sock full of Scooby snacks. I still have the puncture scars on my wrist to prove it. The wounds in my flesh healed up, but, like those people watching Jaws, a seed was planted in my unconscious mind: Dogs bite → Dogs are scary → Stay away from dogs. And over time, that seed grew into a tree called Phobia of Dogs. For years afterward, until I started to study and understand how the nervous system works, I was terrified of dogs. Even a three pound chihuahua that I could’ve drop-kicked like a hacky sack would trigger a fear response in me.

By the time we’re ten years old, we’ve all experienced intense emotional experiences that plant their seeds in our unconscious. As we reach adulthood, those seeds have grown into a forest of trees that we have to navigate through. Some of the trees are helpful. We climb them, we build with them, we use them as guide posts. But others become obstacles, towering redwoods that seem impossible to surmount. We can’t go back and stop the seed from being planted, and we can’t just chop the tree down because it’s roots run too deep. The only solution is to change the way we perceive the tree.

At the root (pun intended) of what we do here at IMS is developing an understanding of the nervous system and the workings of our unconscious selves. Like the operating system of your computer, the nervous system is always on, always running in the background, throwing the switches on our emotions, thoughts, and actions. The programming that runs the operating system is made up of your individual, completely unique, life experiences. When we’re not paying attention, the software just runs on its own, going in loops, drawing on the most intense emotional experiences to inform our next actions. The good news is, you can learn how to reprogram the operating system. We can’t rewrite the software, but we can rewire how the operating system responds to the software.

Your nervous system is constantly on alert, analyzing all of your sensory input. It's a finely tuned machine that’s been developed over millions of years. But its focus is very narrow. Black or white, hot or cold, good or bad. The nervous system doesn’t dabble in nuance. The truth is, the nervous system doesn’t “know” anything. It simply reacts, with the singular goal of keeping us alive. When the nervous system senses danger, it shifts into “fight or flight” mode. We experience this through emotions like fear, anger, anxiety. When the nervous system feels safe, it shifts into “rest and digest” mode. We experience this through feelings of love, serenity, peace. When we experience an emotionally intense event, the nervous system stores that information away for future reference. It plants the seed. As time goes by, every instance that remotely resembles the earlier experience will trigger the nervous system to react, and the seed grows into a tree. 

The most common example of how the nervous system gets wired is the Hot Stove Scenario. You're a toddler, running around the house, not a care in the world. You don’t know a stove from a dishwasher from a can of tuna. You also don’t know that mommy just took a boiling pot of water off the front burner, or what a boiling pot of water is, or what a front burner is. You reach up and WHAMMO! It’s a sensation you’ve neve experienced before and it is not a good one. The nervous system fires up: DANGER! DANGER! And just to spice things up, maybe mommy has a big reaction of her own which also gets seared into your memory banks. Man, that’s a seed that gets buried so deep it almost came out the other side. For the rest of your life you won’t approach a stove without giving it that little quick tap first.

All of us have had hot stove scenarios in our lives. Sometimes it’s something as straightforward as getting bitten by a dog, which for me, created a fear of dogs. Other times it’s more complicated. Wires get criss-crossed, things get turned upside down. The nervous system gets tricked into thinking something harmful is actually good for us. I see this all the time. People repeating harmful behaviors over and over again because of how the nervous system is interpreting some earlier emotional experience.

Let’s take food, for example. I’ve worked with numerous clients who’ve had the same experiences around food. Sugars and sweets, to be specific. It usually goes something like this: When they were a kid, every time they skinned a knee, or got their feelings hurt, or just felt bad in general, mom would make it all better with a plate of chocolate chip cookies. Now they find themselves trapped in a cycle of feeling bad, eating a box of cookies to feel better, then feeling shame about the cookies, which just kick-starts the whole thing all over again.

Now remember, as good as the nervous is at doing what it does, it’s not always the brightest bulb in the chandelier. It’s still operating on code that was written millions of years ago, when food was a scarce commodity. When you eat a candy bar, the nervous system lights up like a pinball machine. Because the nervous system doesn’t know there’s an endless supply of candy bars at your disposal. As far as it’s concerned, you may never see another candy bar again. So it sends strong signals to the brain: THIS IS GOOD. MORE OF THIS. So, couple a plate of chocolate chip cookies with the soothing feeling of mom comforting you, attach it to experiences of sadness, or fear, or shame, and you’ve got yourself a powerhouse of a seed planted in very fertile soil. 

But here’s the catch: Wiring of the nervous system works both ways. In fact, we can do it with intention. As I developed my knowledge of the nervous system and how it works, I came to understand that I wasn’t really afraid of dogs. I was afraid of reliving the experience of getting bitten by a dog. Using techniques and strategies that I’ve developed over the years, I was able to change the way I perceived what happened that day almost forty years ago, and I was able to rewire the way my nervous system responds when I see a dog. And the good news is, it’s possible to rewire your nervous system no matter the severity of the intense emotional events you’ve experienced.

Right now, we’re gearing up for one of my favorite programs: Inner Matrix Evolution. This is a Mastery Track intensive weekend where I work with a limited group of clients, tending the sticky, deep, or long established patterns that I call ‘silent ghosts’. These patterns can be particularly destructive because they impact the way we operate and hold us back in multiple areas of life. At Evolution, it’s just me and 20 individuals, each person working through their pattern over a long weekend. This program has a profound impact. Click HERE to reserve your spot in Evolution, or reach out to your Care Advisor to get on the wait list.

Of course, you can always join us for our Power Series where we explore all of the fascinating intricacies of the nervous system and how it works. We’ll provide you with the tools, techniques, and strategies for understanding your own nervous system and how to rewire emotional patterns and behaviors to align with the life you want to create. Click HERE to learn more about the Power Series and sign up today!